I have always been an odd sleeper. I was born as the sun rose out of the sea and perhaps that marked me as someone who wants to grasp the day and chase the light? Apparently, I rarely seemed to sleep as a baby, but would happily lie in my cot and smile every time my parents sneaked in to see if I was asleep yet. Throughout childhood I had bouts of sleepwalking, and experienced nightmares that I can still remember. However, I was also very happy occupying that space in between sleep and wakefulness – it was such a ripe place for my imagination to roam.
I discovered in adulthood that I can easily awaken from the slightest noise of a leaf rustling on the porch but can sleep through a raging storm and a party next door. I can happily “social nap” at a party, festival or in a park, and have weeks of delicious deep sleep. But when Perimenopause gate crashed earlier into my life than expected, things had to change. It was the ultimate thief of my sleep and the bringer of anxiety and truth serum dreams. This was when I knuckled down and finally learned the art of sleep and how to tend this garden of rest. What is this mysterious place where we scoot off to for a defrag and reboot? Why does it feel so deathly if we miss out on enough sleep? How can we ensure that we get better and deeper sleep for our health and sense of wholeness?
Sleep is my Friend is a 4-week yoga therapy module to explore Rest and Sleep, because examining Rest is a vital key to discovering good Sleep. We learn how we can unwind from the colonisation of our natural sleep cycles and reframe our sleep habits. We appreciate how we need to woo ourselves for a good sleep with little cues throughout the day – we cannot simply DEMAND sleep at the end of a stressful day.
This course uses the tools of breathwork, restorative yoga, yoga nidra and adopting the practice of night journaling for deeper appreciation of what is actually happening with your sleep and night adventures. We discuss partners and pets, dealing with snoring and getting real about “sleep divorce”. We also explore Chi cycles and Moon cycles as a way of framing our life to make space for Being as well as Doing. We also learn some simple dream awareness techniques so we can appreciate this liminal world as a place of insight. Bedtime becomes a place to look forward to and an opportunity to nurture yourself even on those nights where sleep is elusive. Stop dreaming about getting good sleep and wake up to finding the tools to help you get there!
This four-week module starts on Wed May 15th 7-8.30pm. You are welcome to attend in person, on zoom or simply receive a recording.
I am planning a fundraiser to support my Yoga Nidra teacher to keep doing her important training work (and also continue to offer me support to help you!) My dear teacher Uma Dinsmore-Tuli is an incredibly courageous person who has had the audacity to expose sexual/physical and emotional abuse in the world of yoga. Yes YOGA! That lovely thing where we feel safe and relaxed. Well sadly it is not like that for everyone and pretty much all yoga schools have some ugly little secrets hidden away.
Uma refused to back down from publishing her second edition of her book Yoni Shakti that included the exposure of historic and current abuse that has affected women, men and children in yoga ashrams, training and retreat centres throughout the world. She wanted people to know where it was simply not safe to go and also to stop the perpetuation of abuse in yoga. It is very sad that the yoga alliance and register fails to properly investigate or tackle abuse in yoga, and Uma wanted to remedy this situation. Not surprisingly she was taken to court by several multinational yoga corporations and amazingly she won most of the cases brought against her. However, she incurred hideous lawyer fees along the way and is now in a financial pickle. The rest of the reasons for this are found in the link below. Fundraiser by Shakti Sisters : Umā Dinsmore-Tuli needs your help- time-sensitive (gofundme.com)
I would love to offer a fundraiser special edition nidra cauldron evening on Sunday 5th May 6pm. Come for a simple dinner, bring your wishes to stir into the cauldron and offer a koha. You are also welcome to attend via zoom ( sadly no dinner for you!) or have a recording. Please give whatever you can afford as it not only supports Uma, but it supports her to support me, to support you! She nourishes me with daily practice so that I have the skills and capacity to offer free nidra via Arrow fm, and koha yoga. Let’s feed the Mother of Nidra! You can either make a donation which I can send on the night of the feast or directly give via the link above.
Please RSVP if you would like to attend in person so that I make enough food and create enough nidra nests. Hope to see you!
Normally I try to stay vaguely politically neutral DURING classes. You are probably chuckling as you read this, and all I can say is that I am not saying all the things I want to say. A student was surprised recently to discover I was married. “But you are such a rabid feminist” which made me beam for the rest of the week.
This recent coalition government has shattered all notions of me holding my tongue and playing nicely neutral. It feels like we have been slammed into reverse at speed and heading into all the dark stuff of the 70’s. As you know I am all for flares, disco and hippy shit, but really not into racism, exploitation of the environment and poverty shaming. Somehow with 40 days of squabbling and the stroke of a pen we find ourselves in a new and rather bleak world without a Maori Health Authority, smoking now a new tax revenue, plus the sadness of having exploration for oil and gas, Te Reo/Treaty trashing and live animal exports all back on the menu. If you work in any way that is community funded, then the future is uncertain…
Layered on top of all that is happening in our country, is all the awfulness of what is unfolding far beyond, in Gaza and the Ukraine, and the steep slide into climate change with 2023 being the second hottest day on record. We are living in a time of intersection – where all the problems of racism, colonialism, capitalism, sexism ( all the “isms”!), peak oil, carbon emissions and pollution have all converged. It is like trying to untangle a toxic ball of wool. Some days it feels like it is time to put the Wonder Woman bangles back on and stick it to the man. However, here is the thing – if we get into fight mode then we burn out very quickly. Instead we need to take good care of ourselves so that we have the endurance to make healthy changes. We need a calm nervous system so that we have the patience to have difficult conversations with people, write endless submissions, and above all stay in love with the world.
This coming year I am offering a new program that you can opt into and out of as you wish. You can be there for the whole year or take a break as needed. While there will be class rates I also want to offer koha for anyone who needs it, as I believe everyone should have access to tools regardless of what they can afford. It is called the Revolution Cauldron! The aim is to nourish and strengthen yourself so that you can have the capacity to stay present, speak up, and create community. It is for anyone needing support, not just those feeling political “meh”ness.
We start by building a healthy home base and restore the natural cycles of our bodies. We re-learn how to breathe, improve our digestion and hormonal balance, and reclaim our natural sleep patterns from the industrial model. We learn how to stay informed and take action without becoming overwhelmed with a simple 3 step process on a daily basis. However the key ingredient is reclaiming rest, pleasure and connection as necessities of life that should be abundant to all beings.
Like all things cyclical, the programme will also interweave with other modules I am running such as Love your Tum, RHB’s and a new series of sessions for Endometriosis and pelvic pain. When we are in pain or hormonal upheaval the world can seem all too much, but giving support to these issues expands our capacity to stay connected to self and others.
The latter part of the year is a deep exploration of yourself, your lineage, your ancestors, your history and creative biography, because we need to understand the past in order to create a better future. My hope is that the connections we forge will spread like mycelium pathways and lead to a fresh start with a clear mind brimming with ideas. This cauldron might serve up the most delicious soup.
If that all sounds too much then simply sign up for a free weekly email “Micro revolution – tiny steps we can take each week to chip away at the monster” These are small acts of defiance, a teensy thing you can do that might have a big impact for people and the planet. They can be as simple as investigating who/what your kiwisaver is invested in, using your consumer power when doing your weekly shop, or even just planting a few radish seeds. Sign up here
We start the revolution with Breathe Easy – a 4 week module to learn how to breathe for a calm and steady mind. The first class is on Wednesday February 7th 7-8.30pm. You are welcome to be here in person, on zoom or receive a recording. Sign up here
As my favourite Fermentalist Sandor Katz says “The Revolution will not be microwaved! See you in the cauldron.
I have to confess I have been a bit slack with regular newsletters this year, so I shall make it up to you now with an extended reading list – since this is the favourite part for some of you. I have divided it up into sections so you can bypass anything that does not float your boat. Although of course it is always good to read outside of your usual groove.
Wonderment – books to remind you that the world is amazing
The Enchanted Life – Sharon Blackie and also her other books (If women rose rooted and Hagitude) All of her books weave myth and folk tales with place, nature and deep wisdom. It feels like you are being read a bedtime story that nourishes you to your very marrow. These are particularly juicy for anyone with Celtic ancestry.
Mirrors in the Earth – Asia Suler. This collection of beautiful essays about healing coming to us from the natural world is so delicious that you want to immediately re-read it.
Womb – the inside story of where we all began – Leah Hazard. Our first home – the womb is largely overlooked, underfunded in research and has some weird second-class organ status. Hazard woos you to love and respect the womb. If you have never heard of pseudomenses or cervical crypts, then brace yourself!
Gathering Moss – Robin Wall Kimmerer. If you read and loved Braiding Sweetgrass then you will be overjoyed to discover that there is more from this poet/scientist/indigenous fount of wisdom. The book is about moss but also about everything else in life.
Revolution – books to wake you up and shake you into action
What about men – Caitlin Moran. I read this in one sitting! Yes, men are suffering in this Patriarchal System too. Moran addresses porn, mental health, creepy Men’s Rights Activism and why men mainly just do banter.
Undrowned – Black Feminist Lessons from Marine Mammals – Alexis Pauline Gumbs. The submerged wisdom of sea mammals comes up for air with this poetic writing. The natural world offers solutions, if only we would pay attention.
Emergent Strategy – adrienne maree brown. Yes, this was reviewed last year but it honestly takes a year to read (or more). The footnotes contain instructions to read further “if you haven’t read Dune, then put this book down and read it now!) which means that you go off on incredible tangents. If you are working with community groups then this book is a MUST.
A Forager’s Life – Helen Lendorf. You could read this wonderful book for the foraging information and recipes, but the real power lies in Lendorf writing from the edges of our society. Like the plants that grow in the margins, she has grown through punk, social justice, embracing the common land and scrubbing about with weeds.
Looking after Yourself
Anchored – Deb Dana. This is the best book on understanding polyvagal theory and your nervous system. It is full of exercises you can do to self-regulate and get yourself back into a safe space so that you can live a full life.
Your name is not Anxious – Stephanie Dowrick. For some reason anxiety is thought of as a thing that happens in your head. However, for many, upstairs feels just FINE but their bodies betray they are actually anxious. Stephanie Dowrick always writes so beautifully, and this book is no exception.
52 Ways to Walk – Annabel Streets. We all know that walking is the best form of exercise, it is what we are designed to do. This book encourages you to get into it and has a new suggestion each week, so that by the end of a year you will be a walking convert.
Page turners for the holidays
Kindred – Octavia Butler. Back before all the time travel books there was this startling and mind bending novel. And if you love it then you can leap into all her amazing writing that defies genre. Try also the Parable of the Sower series.
Magpie – Elizabeth Day. Creepy, gaslighting, mind blowing novel to blast through on the beach. Ignore everyone and read this.
Another great day at sea – Geoff Dyer. I love his essays and novels and this was a surprisingly addictive book about his residency on an American air carrier. I really recommend “Out of Sheer Rage” and “The Colour of Memory”
One day I will astonish the world – Nina Stibbes. A book about the long view with friendship, living small in a small place and always being overlooked. Nina Stibbes is always funny and even her dark humour lights up the Covid response in the UK.
Lessons – Ian McEwan. Could he ever write a bad novel? If you haven’t read him before then go ahead and reserve a truckload from the library. That will be your summer sorted!
Fluff for Christmas
David Sedaris – read ANYTHING of his. Most of his journal extracts and essays discuss his family and Christmas at some point and they will instantly make you feel better about whatever is going on in your family Christmas! He is incredibly frank and hilarious. He even has a whole book about Christmas called Santaland Diaries.
Finally, two books that are for children and young adults that are sweet, tender and gently explore war themes. I read them a few years ago while camping at Christmas and they feel very relevant during this current conflict. The Skylarks’ war by Hilary McKay is set in idyllic Cornwall and explores the gathering clouds of WW1. Will beloved friends and family members survive? A Song for Summer by Eva Ibbotson is set in an eccentric School for the Arts in the Austrian countryside while Hitler’s Reich looms ever closer. If you need happy endings at the moment, then these are the books for you!
Enjoy your summer reading and I would love to hear what YOU recommend!
Suddenly, just like a hot flush, menopause is the Big Hot News. Everywhere you look there are newspaper articles, tv shows and celebrities fanning themselves. If you are over the age of 45 then the algorithm will joyously send you ads for magic pills to shrink your tummy, gadgets to blitz your chin hairs and crystals to help you sleep and tone your lady bits. While this is a good thing – to finally have something out in the open, something that happens to half of our species, it is also laced with a dose of pathology. Menopause sells with blaring headlines with dreadful symptoms that must be controlled, and somehow it has become a thing to be “fixed”. The part that is often left out of the discussion is that it is a transition, a doorway that leads to a new phase of life. Like most transitions in life, it can be uncomfortable at times but ultimately rewarding.
My experience was baffling as I went into perimenopause much sooner than anyone ever had in my family. None of my circle of friends seemed to be having anxiety, palpitations, insomnia, weird sweaty eyeballs and fatigue. Asking a doctor for a hormone levels test to check resulted in me being told that “I was just worried about losing my looks”. That doctor learned some interesting new truths that I had discovered now came easily to my lips – one symptom that I was actively enjoying.
So, I pieced it all together for myself, I asked my body what it needed and listened. I read widely through medical sources to understand the biology of menopause, explored nutrition with herbalists such as Susun Weed and delved into my own training in homeopathy and yoga therapy. I asked older friends and yoga students to tell me their stories, because it was the lived experiences that I longed for. I started saying no to a lot of things – requests, invitations, expectations and assumptions. I said yes to myself for the first time in my life. Just a teensy bit more yes to me every time I said a no to something, someone or situation. I discovered I was actively enjoying the process and most of the symptoms subsided promptly.
What I learned is that I didn’t need magical pills, patches or creams to get me through this (although there is nothing wrong with saying yes to these things) and thankfully I didn’t need a chin hair gadget! What I needed was a magical recipe of Yoga Nidra, community, space to be me and nourishing herbs.
The Red Hot Bitches is a monthly gathering to help you navigate your way through your transition. While there is no definitive blueprint for menopause, these sessions offer a map of possibilities, with simple tools to support you, wherever you might be on the pathway. To sit in a circle of belonging with others who are in transit and those who have reached the shores of Second Spring is a real homecoming. I offer these sessions so that nobody else ever has to forge a path alone as I did. Come and join us and cackle. There is much joy and hilarity in waking up to who you are.
Red Hot Bitches meets monthly, and you can attend in person or via zoom. Each session discusses a phase of perimenopause, the yogic tools you can use for support through this phase, a sharing circle, Yoga Nidra, and as always herbal tea and cake. Dates/further info are here and you can book in here
Yoga Snug - Odette Rowe 